Our Members

We are a vibrant community of adults committed to caring for each other, sharing and celebrating our passions and skills, creating a rural community “homestead” among gardens, ​animals, and nature, on a path toward more ecological living on earth.  
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​Our Common House, where we love to eat, gather, celebrate and have fun!

Many hands make light work! Our community projects are fun as well.
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​Meet some of the people of Elderberry.
Click on each photo to read our stories.

Vonda • I grew up on a farm in Michigan and upon leaving at the age of 18, I never dreamed I would EVER want to live in the country again! But at the age of 50, when the idea of a rural intentional community came up, it sounded like a good idea. I was one of the founders of Potluck Community Farm and have lived here since 1995. My first husband and I joined the Peace Corps and I taught English and Science in Ethiopia, for three years. We adopted a little Ethiopian boy and we had 2 more sons after we returned to the US. Following a divorce, I came to UNC to go to graduate school in botany and met Cecil Frost. I worked in the Planning Department in Durham for 16 years and then retired to teach first grade for 5 years! I have also been the Person County Democratic Party Chair for 3 years. I spend several weeks each year visiting my three sons and 6 grandchildren in Indiana, Arizona, and Hawaii. I have wool sheep and intend to do more fiber crafts when I get old and have time! Cecil and I been renovating our Potluck house for 25 years and are currently building our Elderberry home as well. Cecil and I have been life partners now for 30 years. We are thoroughly looking forward to living out the rest of our lives at Elderberry. I love the way we have designed Elderberry to promote continued physical activity and health, a path toward sustainable living, and a close community of friends and neighbors to work and play with and to help each other through life.

Mockingbird in the Central Circle

Mary Kay • I was born in Minnesota, grew up in Ohio, and have spent most of the past 40 years in North Carolina. I am the 4th oldest in a family of 8 children. I spent my entire working life in the health care industry: first on the clinical side, then administration, then information technology. I had a midlife crisis in 2006 and sold all my worldly goods and joined the Peace Corps as an HIV Coordinator in Namibia. My service was cut short after 6 months following the sudden death of my brother. Following this, I still wasn’t ready to return to Corporate America, so I became a volunteer for an NGO in Geneva, Switzerland and lived there for 18 months. Both experiences were life-changing. My passion is caring for the planet. I spent five years searching for the right cohousing community, and Elderberry checked off every single box! I've gratefully lived here since 2020.

Nancy • I was born in Ohio, but I lived in Michigan most of life. I’m the 10th of 12 children and the first child in my family to graduate from high school. Right after graduation I married Dick – we were married 67 years and have 4 wonderful sons. Raising four boys was not always easy! Through the years I have helped at church, taught Bible and Sunday school, and have sung in choirs. I did a lot of volunteer work for hospital guilds. My favorite hobbies have been walking (I have belonged to many walking groups over the years), quilting and knitting. I now have more trouble walking but have bought an exercise bike that I love! I’ve made 30-40 quilts of all sizes and colors and have helped with about 20 quilts as part of church groups raising money for charities. I also enjoy reading and am in the Elderberry book club. We moved to NC after considering all of the options and where all of our kids and grandkids lived. We had tired of the Michigan winters decades ago! We wintered with friends in Arizona for five years, and then wintered in the Charleston SC area for another eight years before deciding to retire at Elderberry. After living at Elderberry three years, Dick sadly passed away; but I feel fortunate to be here with a group of wonderful people!

Diane • I moved to Elderberry in March of 2021, and for me it is a wonderful place to be for the foreseeable future. I’ve spent most of my life in Minnesota, primarily in Minneapolis/St. Paul, and in 2003 I moved to Grand Marais, MN, which was home for almost 9 years. This small harbor village on the shore of Lake Superior, 40 miles shy of Canada, is one of just two entry points for the Boundary Waters Canoe Area Wilderness, over 1 million acres of protected land, lakes, waterfalls and moose! I owned a B & B, worked outside of the home marketing the hospitality industry, and was surrounded by incredible natural beauty and lifestyle values very similar to those at Elderberry. I loved it and never minded that the nearest Target, Whole Foods Co-op or movie theater was 110 miles down the road! But the many cold months each year and very short growing season convinced me to make a move, and in 2011 I came to the East Coast to be closer to my families in Baltimore and Raleigh. In Baltimore, I worked for several years in communications for a nonprofit community development organization. I also met some wonderful people who were developing a senior cohousing community, Cohousing of Greater Baltimore. With this fledgling group, I learned about senior cohousing, the overall mission, vision and lifestyle. Their search for a site continues, and my Raleigh daughter convinced me to investigate Elderberry. So much here aligns with my personal values, and the wonderful aspects of living in a caring community are in full force! Since moving to Elderberry, I have worked remotely in Communications for Grace United Methodist Church in Baltimore while finding my best fit here for helping within the community. I love music, especially classical, sacred, the Great American Songbook and jazz. I have landscaped and gardened everywhere I have ever lived since my 20s. I also enjoy cooking, walking, and taking care of my rescue dog Louie. For me, Elderberry represents connection within the community and with the world, respect for the earth and each other, natural beauty, physical work, and intelligent people with diverse interests and experiences. A lot of ingredients here for happiness and joy!

Joanna • I was born in Pensacola, Florida. My sister and I were service brats and moved around quite a bit. I graduated from UVA School of Nursing in Charlottesville where I met and married my husband and we raised our 3 children. As an RN I worked in many different areas; spinal cord injury, infection control, TB, home care to name a few. After our chicks flew away we moved to the Eastern Shore of Virginia. It was there I first encountered the joy of living in community, just 10 to 20 miles apart! We attended a tiny church and a larger Cursillo group on the Shore. As my husband’s illness progressed, we reluctantly moved back to Charlottesville to be closer to family. Missing a close community I began to seriously investigate cohousing. My husband died in 2018 and it was time to decide. My visit to Elderberry cemented in my mind what was important for the next phase in my life. An intentional community, super friendly and happy neighbors who lived their own lives yet were close by, shared values, consensus decisions, working and playing, partying, hiking, mending and meditating, what’s not to love about Elderberry - well, maybe not tracking in sand. And I’ve found a used medical equipment shop where I volunteer. Daisy dog and I have had a wonderful, joyful time settling into our new home.

Michael • I was raised a Catholic boy in Catholic schools, then decided to keep the good Catholic parts and gave up the rest for Lent. It's much more fun to create ritual you love than be a slave to it. Lot less guilt involved, too. I was born in Illinois along the Mississippi River, then migrated to central Illinois. In my younger days I climbed flagpoles, became a conscientious objector, and traveled long distances by moped. I made bacon and burgers and fries and furniture and children and huge radiators for earth-moving machines. I babysat schizophrenics, owned a toy store, and cared for elders. I fell in love with color, art, people, nature, animals, Monty Python, and movies. I fell in love with the hills and trees and beaches of North Carolina. And I fell in love with play, and a community called Potluck Farm. Elderberry seems to be a culmination of all those elements. Elderberry is that place to laugh and cry with the sparkle in my neighbors' eyes, to play with the mystery of love and life. We have created quite a stage for the next act. I want to be Puck.

The large oak that shades our Central Circle

Linda • I was born and raised in Iowa in a university town and spent weekends and summers on my grandparent’s farms helping pluck chickens, shelling peas, and canning/freezing food. In my 20’s and 30’s I camped often with my dog and cat. I love being in nature. In college in the ‘60’s I was part of a women’s collective that was organized around women’s rights issues. It was a great experience. We had the vision of living in community but were yet to develop the necessary experience and skills. When I read about co-housing several years ago, I was immediately drawn to it. I was a member of another cohousing group which unfortunately dissolved after 5 years. My life has been quite a spiritual journey with lots of work, health and travel experiences all providing lessons for my spiritual growth. I had a diverse variety of positions in healthcare and since retirement have diligently taken on my own healthcare challenges leading to improved health and energy.

Mary • I am a country girl at heart. While I love an evening in town for dinner or to see a show (especially plays, music and dancing), I want to wake up every morning in a quiet, peaceful, beautiful place where the only sounds are chickens crowing and sometimes donkeys braying (ok, that’s not always peaceful). I have been a part of Potluck Farm (next to Elderberry) since 1990. During that time I enjoyed living, supporting and playing with other members of my community, and I kept a menagerie of critters. Although I am still young (in my mind anyway – mid 60s), I live alone and I realized that it was becoming more challenging to take care of my home, barn, animals, greenhouse and gardens by myself. So I moved to Elderberry where I can do many or the activities I love in the company of others, and with their help, as needed. I love having people to play with in close proximity. I enjoy playing games – both outdoor games (croquet, jenga, bean toss, shuffleboard) – and indoor games (board games, card games and especially our pinochle group). I also find a lot of joy in doing art, playing music, woodworking, hiking and kayaking (all things that I do regularly with my Elderberry neighbors). I am now retired, but I have worked in veterinary science, investor relations, communications and organizational development. I grew up in Michigan and I miss the cold clear lakes, but have grown to appreciate the NC climate. I often go camping in Michigan in the hottest part of the NC summer. I have always been inspired to build things with my hands (from tree houses as a kid to a real house as an adult) and I LOVED working on the Elderberry common house. My next big project is helping to restore the Elderberry log cabin and log barn!

Karolyn • My very happy childhood was spent outside baby-booming Washington, DC. In college in Ithaca, New York, Richard and I met up, and then began stops in Champaign-Urbana, Louisville, Boston, Chicago, Big Stone Gap (Virginia), Philadelphia, and southern Indiana (where we retired at age 51). I had had a pleasant career, largely in marketing and public relations for hospitals and colleges, and I was ready to reciprocate my good fortune. So, I have spent my retirement volunteering for hospice, Habitat for Humanity, etc. In southern Indiana, our church’s Sharing Spiritual Journeys discussion group reinforced the idea of living more simply, naturally and compassionately. We began casually exploring co-housing as a potential next step. An almost accidental visit to Elderberry felt great; we immediately enjoyed the people and their vision; and so…ta da! in 2016 we down-sized into our new Elderberry home. I am happy and excited with new friends and new opportunities here and in the community.

Richard • 1964 Valedictorian at an ordinary high school with a few great teachers. Choose Cornell over West Point or MIT, and that has made all the difference. 1968 Graduated, Married, Drafted 1969 – 1971 Finish alternate service, try teaching. 1971 – 1975 Experience Boston with a sanity point in Buckfield, ME. Graduate again, having morphed from voter studies to computer jock. A view of the good life emerges. 1976 – 1979 Experience Chicago. Homestead our edge-of-the-prairie back yard with day jobs in the Loop. 1980 – 1983 Follow the dream to Big Stone Gap, VA, a sophisticated little town in the coal pit of the universe. Start by heeling in 2000 trees and rebuilding a huge, century old house on the base of Black Mountain. 1984 The coal runs out; the dream sleeps. 1984 – 1998 Experience Philadelphia. Mainlining. Mainstreaming. Work, work, work. Money, money, money. 1998 WE QUIT!!! 1998 – 2014 The good life grows from my roots and family in Southern Indiana. Building, volunteering, growing. 2014 – 2016 Journey to a new level and a new family at Elderberry.

Nancy • I was born in New York, NY, where our parents met. Shortly after my brother was born, we moved to Jersey (exit 109) and the two of us spent our childhood there exploring on our bicycles. My dad was a graphic designer and portrait artist. My mom worked in finance once we got to high school. I studied philosophy and linguistics at college and later got my MFA in theater. My area of expertise is designing and making things that respond to and support the grand designs of others, i.e., theatrical costumes and props large and small for opera, dance and drama. Working inside the constraints of academic theater production, my teaching model endeavored to empower the realization of personal gifts and emphasize lateral skill sharing and the collective ownership of ideas. I have spent spare time on two college radio news teams bringing students along to record interviews with community leaders and engineer the captured audio into news segments for broadcast. As part of a rescued bicycle rebuilding & enhancing collective, I have dabbled in small electronics that light up, make or collect noise. I greatly enjoy participatory music and dance. Arriving here a city dweller from Boston (and previously NYC and San Francisco) I now look forward to experiencing a new culture & reimagining my life within the bucolic wonder of rural NC.

Chuck • I am a Charlotte, NC native and have spent most of my life in the state. I am the oldest of 4 and married Elissa, the youngest of 3. I worked in the construction industry all of my life, starting as a carpenter remodeling and building houses. That knowledge let me into commercial construction where I spent the last 30 years building fire stations, libraries, etc. I really enjoy fixing and building things but somehow ended up as a Superintendent in the management side of the construction industry. My greatest accomplishment was convincing my wife, Elissa, to marry me. We now have 2 grown children and 3 wonderful teenage grandchildren. We share a mutual love of animals, especially dogs which led us to rescue Rufus, an amazing black lab. In November 2021 we took the plunge and moved into the Elderberry community. Boy, was this a great decision! We love hiking and have found the Elderberry properties wonderful to explore with Rufus. I have been an avid cyclist for many years and there are some great county roads here around Elderberry. The beauty and peace of this place is incredible. We had been searching for a place of deep community and chance to practice living together with others. This, combined with the love and care of our planet, is one of Elderberry’s prime directives. I have really enjoyed just hanging out with the Berries. They are such a great group of deep thinkers blessed with a healthy dose of silliness. I can’t wait to see what comes next!

Joy at the dog park!

Elissa • I grew up in Huntersville, NC with parents who owned the local Ford Dealership and an older brother and sister. Chuck (my husband) and I met my senior year in High School on the very first Earth Day. In the 70’s we dropped out and went “Back to the Land” to work on a very big family farm in Asheville, NC. We had no previous experience with farm life but couldn’t wait to learn as much as possible. We discovered we loved being part of the farm community! At some point family obligations called us back to Huntersville and we got busy raising kids and doing life in the suburbs but retaining a yearning for something different and more of a shared experience. I discovered Elderberry over 5 years ago while researching intentional communities in North Carolina for a class I was taking. We visited Elderberry for the first time in 2016. We loved the land and the people but it just wasn’t the right time for us. Fast forward to a time of Covid and its isolation and we began to dream again of a different idea of community living and Elderberry popped up once more. Now that our kids and grandchildren were growing up and away we thought this would be a great time for a change. We made the decision to buy a house here and we are so grateful we did. In November 2021, we moved from Charlotte, NC into our small but well-designed house. It is hard to express how wonderful the move has been. Our calendar is full of opportunities both here at Elderberry as well as new adventures in the surrounding communities of Durham and Hillsborough. We can be as busy and involved as we want to be or just spend days walking in the woods or reading a good book while sitting on our porch. It is good to know that we can participate in the garden and share in the bounty but there are many hands helping to prepare the soil, start the seeds, do the weeding and all the other numerous garden tasks involved. I have learned so much from our neighbors and have had wonderful conversations that have led to some interesting possibilities. There are so many small family farms within 30 minutes of our community that I am hoping to explore and help support. We are enjoying finding new state and regional parks and nature preserves to hike with our dog, Rufus. We have also connected with the local refugee services in the area in order to offer our time and energy. I love the inward/outward balance of life at Elderberry. It suits us to a T!

Anne • My life began in the heart of Pennsylvania Dutch country in Lancaster County. Both of my parents were avid gardeners, so when they built their suburban home, they purchased extra land. Here they created a veritable paradise of shady trees, evergreens, shrubs, fruit trees and grape arbors. Along with my mother’s many flower beds, it was the perfect setting for hours of imaginative play as a child. After obtaining a degree in Ornamental Horticulture, I was employed in what I considered my dream job. As a horticulturist at an historic site on the Hudson River in NY, amidst 434 acres of rolling lawns, woodlands and formal gardens, I was once again able to let my imagination run free. I was hired specifically to research the many early 20th century gardens, propagate old varieties in a 1929 restored greenhouse and oversee their design and planting. In 1999, my husband and I moved to NC. It was Jeff’s enthusiasm for Cohousing that brought us to Elderberry. Today I am continuing my love of creating with plants by landscaping around our new home as well as participating on the landscape committee. In addition to gardening, my other pleasures include reading, cooking & baking, vacationing at the NC coast and attending a small, nearby rural church where I am encouraged to grow spiritually and share God’s love in my community.

Pamela • I am an energized baby boomer with a sense of adventure and practicality. I was born and raised in Los Angeles, California. In 1979 I started my quest to see the world. I have been fortunate to travel and visit some very cool places. My current vision is to reconnect with nature and embrace a low-impact lifestyle. Elderberry is a great opportunity to surround myself with other people committed to having an extraordinary life.

Jeffrey • I’ve moved to Elderberry because building community has been important to me my whole life. I do appreciate my own space and having the chance to be introspective. But together, we can usually accomplish more than one can alone. I think of myself as a people person. I’ve lived in different settings, have had more careers than should fit in one life, and have been involved with many organizations. Whether living in a co-housing community or anticipating the future of the world, it seems like most issues are best resolved with transparency, open discussion, and respect for others. Live and let live! Many centuries ago, Augustine advised “In essentials unity, in non-essentials liberty, in all else charity”. No need to force my preferences on others. I look forward to meeting some new friends at Elderberry, preserving our planet for future generations, and most of all some laughs and good times.

Carl • I grew up in Southern California around lots of orange groves and farms. After college I taught school using my Spanish and worked on a Masters in Counseling Communication. Got married in my 40s and began to work with injured workers as a Vocational Rehabilitation Counselor. We adopted older children from Russia and moved to Vermont, where there were many therapists and parents, familiar with attachment and trauma signs. We built a highly energy-efficient green home and I had a large orchard and vegetable garden. Meditation became a needed de-stressing strategy and I practiced EEG biofeedback with our own children, then many others. I moved to North Carolina to become a Licensed Professional Counselor and practice EEG biofeedback. When I have time I like hiking, bicycle riding, singing and playing stringed acoustic music. I was attracted to elder cohousing, with a huge focus on developing the community ourselves. At Elderberry I have built my own passive solar home with autoclaved aerated concrete. I am impressed with the support, big listening and vision of sizable gardens that we plan to eat from most of the year. Communication is the most complex action. Luckily, the communication level and the Quaker model of listening positively affect our ability to embrace and accept change and differences. Wonderful empowerment values are alive here in Elderberry for community, diversity, and honest communication.

Finn the bookworm

Don and Theresa • We are a couple of boomers originally from Toledo Ohio. We met at a high school dance and being lazy, figured we were good enough for each other. Nothing much exciting for the next couple of years - got married and moved to southern Ohio where we played at being adults. We moved around until we landed in western Massachusetts. Then life got real when these two little kids showed up (well, were born). Worked some, both went back to school, worked some more and mostly enjoyed the ride of life. Somehow, we all survived and in spite of us, these two little kids became really awesome, smart, strong women.   Got sick of northern winters so moved to Florida to retire but retiring did not stick. Had to find another plan. Became excited about cohousing and attended a national conference in May 2015 in Durham, NC. Toured several local cohousing communities both established and being built, one being Elderberry. Seemed different from the others so we tucked it into our someday maybe file.     Landed back in Massachusetts, mostly to follow above mentioned awesome kids. Funny thing though, northern winters were still cold. After a few years freezing six months of the year, one of us remembered Elderberry, this funky, fun community in Rougemont, North Carolina. Sent an email, got a call, went for a visit, and the rest is history.   If you are searching for a wonderful, caring community that genuinely believes in cooperation and consensus with a sprinkling of ridiculous fun, come for a visit. We will be the ones laughing all the way into old age. 

Joyce • First the somewhat unremarkable big picture: Born and raised in Connecticut, I was the third of four children. Attended Paier School of Art outside of New Haven, Connecticut and majored in graphic design, illustration, and figure study. Craving a dramatic change of culture I moved to Pasadena, California and got it! Two years later, next stop was Denver, Colorado where I discovered another culture shift with mountains, nature and an introduction to Rolfing and the healing arts. Married and moved to Durham in 1986 where my roots now run deep, especially here at Elderberry! The details: In Durham I started a “niche” graphic design studio working for 32 years with non-profits, education and corporate accounts. I loved every part of running my small business — my clients, the work, my associates. I finally closed my doors in December 2019 and retired. After divorcing in 2007, I rediscovered myself again through hiking the Eno trails around my home, swimming anywhere except pools, watching birds and rediscovering my connection with nature. My two cats would follow me into the woods near my home where we’d wander. I learned to experience nature through the eyes and senses of my cats. I consider myself somewhat of an extroverted introvert. Interestingly, Elderberry is a perfect situation for introverts. I can maintain a comfortable balance of social time with quiet. In a way, I feel I’ve strengthened my essence here, feeling an ease and comfort around dear friends and community I hadn’t found anywhere else. I also take more risks, learning new skills such as facilitation (to deal with my fear of public speaking), small engine maintenance and being part of a construction crew on several big projects! This is the time and place to do anything and everything!

Tommy • I moved to Elderberry in August, 2024. Before that I was living on my 6 acres in a tiny house in rural Florida. That land was 100% wooded when I bought it and I spent two years clearing the property and making gardens. Prior to that I was wwoofing (Worldwide Opportunities on Organic Farms - https://wwoof.net/) in Tallahassee building a sand bag house. I have wwoofed in WA, OR, CA, HI, TN, NC, SC and Belize. I have been to several communities in my travels. They talked the talk but didn't walk the walk. At Elderberry I have learned that living in community can be a challenge, but the kindness/caring spirit of my neighbors has been amazing. I have always been a physical person. I enjoy working hard and getting dirty. I believe everyone is born with a gift. For some, their gift is obvious. For others they can live a long life and never realize their gift. My gift is endurance. What's yours?

Channele • One of six, I was born and raised in a (once) rural Virginia community about 50 miles south of Washington DC. Our home was a gathering place for the many aunts uncles and cousins. My Dad grew an enormous garden while my Mom cooked and put up for the winter. We never went hungry! I learned early to grow my own food and make do with what I had and what life gave me. I married, raised five children, divorced, went back to college and had a successful career in energy statistics with the federal government. I moved to western Maryland in 2005 to escape suburban growth in my home territory. Along the way, as a natural progression from my lifelong fascination with textiles and sewing, I taught myself to knit, launching an interest in fiber arts leading to spinning weaving and natural dyeing. Since retiring I’ve had more time for my fiber pursuits as well as camping, traveling, reading and planning new adventures. I moved to Elderberry in 2025, looking for a way to live a sustainable and simpler lifestyle in community with common minded neighbors. I believe I’ve found it.

Happy to call Elderberry home!
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